Tonight starts the 7-10 day cycle of white blood cell transfusions.

We managed to avoid this step in mid April, yet here we are at the end of May doing exactly what we thought we wouldn't have to do. We are promised that this will be rough. These little buggers are the mean cells. We have been told to expect to go to PICU.

Ten weeks ago today I learned my daughter was in a hospital, and today she is no better than she was that first day. As a matter of fact, she would probably argue that she feels a lot worse. And she will feel a lot worse before the next 7-10 days are over.

Today was a whirlwind full of tests, many doctors, and a lot of tough choices. In the midst of it all came Miss Bonnie and her hubby with a lovely gift. I had no more than two blips of a second to say, "Thank You" and be wisked away to talk to two more people waiting to talk everything over with me as my daughter waited for me with three different machines beeping. Chaos.

Let me say thank you to not only Miss Bonnie for her wonderfully thoughtful presents, but to everyone that I never have more than that amount of time to thank. Please know that there is not one spare moment in my life at this hospital, and while I feel horrible that I cannot properly tell you all how wonderful your support is, I just do not have time away from the madness that is surrounding us. There is no down time. I am always hit at some time during a day how little time I have to thank everyone of you who have baked, prayed, driven, supported (emotionally and financially) my family and myself. I feel horrible that I can't thank you properly for the love you show us constantly. I also know that I cannot spend one less second than I am with my children, and thank yous are going to have to wait to be done properly. We are exhausted from how much time it takes to be sick at Hopkins. I am so done in I could not wake up to take my son to school yesterday. I have nothing left, and we are just starting on the tough part.

Thank you everyone. We cannot do this without your prayers and support!

Please forgive me for not answering phones and getting back to your kind messages, and in general being a walking posterchild of how not to be Emily Post. I really really wish I could let you know how beautiful you all are. I just can't right now.

Please please please pray for her the next 7-10 days!!! We can only pray that her medical team is doing what is best and this will eventually help to bring her home.

Happy knitting.